Who Doesn't Like a Good Conspiracy?

Every once in a while, I enjoy cruising off to a place where I am free to discuss the latest Hollywood gossip, guess which senators are gay, and decide once and for all whether or not Rosie O'Donnell is annoying. I call this place... My Topical Island.

Recently, a video of Tom Cruise leaked onto the internet, a secret recruitment video for the Church of Scientology. But perhaps "leak" isn't the right term. The video didn't so much as leak onto the internet but gushed with the fury of a thousand tsunamis.

YouTube pulled the video under "threat" of "legal action" by the "Church" of Scientology. By some miracle, the video was put back up again, this time in six parts. Oh, did I say miracle? What I meant was "miracle."

The videos (now absent from YouTube), however weird they came across, used Tom Cruise's acting abilities to their advantage, laying the Church of Scientology's tenets out for all to see. Generic tenets, sure, but some very familiar tenets of organized religion (service to others, spiritual supremicism, etc.) Millions of people saw these videos. It was like "2 Girls, 1 Cup" times a MILLON THOUSANDS! The Church of Scientology's veil of secrecy has been lifted, or at least that's what they want you to think.

This whole scenario hinted at a surprisingly genius, albeit sinister, ulterior motive. In essense, they used the morbid curiousity surrounding the human husk known as Tom Cruise to catapult their message to the viral video-consuming masses.

It's like the time someone at my house ate my Dilly Bar. The Dilly Bar was gone, the wrapper was in the trashcan, and my father was covered in chocolate and ice cream. Just too many coincidences...

So, they tricked millions of people into watching a recruitment video. Big deal, if Tay Zonday can do it, why can't "America's Samurai"? But just recently the internet is ablaze over a new video concerning Scientology. This one posted by a group of hackers (presumably Johnny Lee Miller and Angelina Jolie) known as Anonymous. Not getting any points for originality, Anonymous aims to take down Scientology. Take a look:



And a second one:



This article provides some insight to their greater goals as well as speculation on their history. I am more disturbed by these videos than by the ranting and raving of Maverick or Lestat or whatever his name was in Cocktail because of its implications. Scientology is constantly looking to be persecuted, and are extremely litigious when it comes to criticism of their beliefs. Their legal battles are well-documented, and cast their church in a very unfavorable light. Here is what I think: Anonymous is damage control.

Anonymous is actually the Church of Scientology throwing shit at themselves in an effort to tip the scales of general acceptance in their favor, and perhaps catch a few stray fishies in the process. They are calling attention to examples of their "persecution" (secret murders, brainwashing) in order to cast themselves in the role of "persecuted peoples".

This is a cynical evaluation and hypothesis on the recent Scientology-related videos that is of my own creation. I don't mean to offend anyone with any of the things that I say, but I never mean to offend. Rather, I feel this is a topical issue worth examining perhaps deeper that the surface level.

Remember what I said about the Dilly Bar.